jueves, 23 de diciembre de 2010

Girl again one year after!

Ok. Rainbow baby is not a boy. Rainbow baby is a girl, we put her Emilia.

Howcome?? I got this news someweeks ago, and I am very happy. I know that Inés will never be here and that this baby is a complete different human being. But I also think that many dreams have come back, like giving Isabel a little sister. It is her dream to have a sister, and I am SO SO SO happy to have this chance again. I have deep afffection for my sisters, they are my best friends and they have been so supportive throughout my life that I will to provide Isabel with such a possibility. I know that in the end a strong relation between sisters depend on many other factors other than the gender, however I have been willing just for the chance of her to build such relation. I am so joyful riht now, even in this tough days when Inés first birthday is about to come.

B and I discussed about what to do on that day and we have being sharing similar ideas. First, Ines´ashes are at home and we now feel ready to put them in her crypt (yes it took us a year to take her there), and her first birthday is a good day for doing it, I feel prepared. It must have been great that instead we could be planning her first party but I have to accept that I am excited about her birthday, even if it will be just about remembering her. I really want to honor her during all January 2, 2011.

B and I feel we want to share this upcoming day just with Isabel and Emilia, just our family. However, some family members have asked us about what is going on that day, so we might do a special mass that sunday evening with some family and friends. I might appear like a freak but I am excited about preparing a special day for my beautiful baby Inés.

3 comentarios:

  1. Congratulations on your third daughter!

    I can certainly understand being excited about planning Ines's first birthday. Just because our daughters are dead doesn't mean we don't love them so much and want to celebrate the life that they DID lead, as short as it was. And even if, sadly, a part of that day means laying her ashes in their final resting spot.

    We overdid it a bit (emotionally) as we invited quite a lot of people together, and in retrospect I wished we had kept it private so we could also have the time to grieve, if we wanted. I think your combination - a family celebration plus a mass with extended family - may be a good idea. Whatever you do, I hope it feels just right. I will certainly be remembering Ines on January 2nd...a candle will be lit here in cold, snowy Denmark and a prayer will be sent to her.

  2. Congratulations on another sweet baby girl!!! What a blessing!

  3. Happy birthday to dear little Ines. I am lighting a candle for her today. It is a beautiful day in Denmark. I wish she was here with you but I know she is in spirit. Sending you and your family lots of extra love today.

    PS I just read your birth story again and I am so sorry you never got to hold your beautiful daughter while she was alive. But I know you hold her in your thoughts every single day and I believe she can feel that and feel your intense love and pride.